Blog: Now Boarding

The more I think about the past six months, the honest the answers become to my questions. February I left my job to pursue editing in the industry and to move to Canada. It appears the reason I left wasn’t about my career, my goals, or anyone else but it was about getting on the right road to lead me to my fate.

At one point in all of our lives we stop and have to look at our self in the mirror. We ask our self questions we would commonly ask a stranger: Who are you? Where are you going?

If we are honest, most of the time we don’t know the answer to those questions. I guess we have to decide when we are going to answer them. Search for the truth? Or keep on moving in whatever direction you are moving towards.

After I left my job in February, I could feel myself getting lost – I no longer knew where I was going. I thought I was moving forward because I was going towards a goal I made five years ago but my inner dialogue was haunting me.

As I was living the dream, traveling the world, meeting new people, seeing new sights and drinking the best teas in the world, I was faced with a question every person ask themselves at one point, “Where do I belong?” I felt like I could live anywhere in the world and survive but the real question is, “Where do You want me God?”

From travel to travel, day-to-day, month to month, I asked this question. I received my answer in Paris but it wasn’t until I was in Vancouver did I listen.

“You belong at your post.”

The journey was needed to find the answer.

Those on the outside wont understand, they will think she failed. They will think she couldn’t find a job, they will whisper she tried. But I will say I went, I learned, I saw, I heard, I found peace, I found faith, I discovered the answer, I found where I belong, I found who I am, I know who I am following, I trust where He is leading, stopping was necessary, listening meant doing, and going back means I am ready to move forward.

The differences between me and others is that I want to go where He wants me not where they say I should be. Not even where I think I want to be. “I want my dream to be Your dream, it’s where I am the most happiest Father. You know me better than I will ever know myself, You know eternity.”

If the past few months were a movie, my life would be a Miniplot- opening ending, inner conflict, self discovery…yes, it would be your classic indie movie. The movie will end where it started.. San Bernardino, but the audience will leave the theater with a new discovery about where they are in their own life.

Next month, I will be returning to my old job to do a new job. A place that was created for me. A position with new challenges, responsibility, and possibilities. I will be in charge of the TV department, a boss, a supervisor, a leader. I have only been given a glimpse of where we will be going, but I know it’s somewhere no one thought possible, not even myself.

I finally made it to the correct platform.
Now Boarding a new adventure.

13 Comments

  1. Monica, you sure know how to put your thoughts vividly. This is a wonderful interpretation and introspection of your ”self”. These words have great value. Thank You for sharing the same. It reminds me of some people who are currently experiencing the same feeling and thought process. I hope they find what you found!

  2. For some weird reason, your story reminds me of the wizard of oz, you know how she goes “if I ever go looking for my heart’s desire again, I won’t look any further than my own backyard; because if it isn’t there, I never really lost it to begin with.”

  3. i’m still on that journey. i don’t have the ability to freely travel as far and as often and you do, but the few traveling i have done i feel like i’m coming closer to where i sense the Lord asking me to be. But I still don’t know where that it is… Honestly, you’ve inspired me to apply for work outside of my comfort zone (which for me is Los Angeles) I found myself applying to jobs in states I never thought I’d be interested in. Since we connected you have inspired me to stretch beyond my comfort zone. So thanks for being yourself, my friend. Continue to search God’s heart. Wherever that is.

    1. wow sal thank you so much for sharing this. I think its great you are enlarging your vision, that is the kinda heart God wants to work with. Im excited to see where your future leads! 🙂 Keep in touch my creative friend.

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