Photos: The Wedding Dress

The past few months I’ve been really bored with photography. I asked one of my friends if she wanted to do an artsy shoot with her old wedding dress. I knew she had gotten married in the 90s, so I thought it would be fun and random to shoot some photos.

I had no idea these photos would teach me something about the wedding dress.

For many girls, the wedding day is their dream day. I see it in all my friends who are engaged to be married. Their countdown to the day, their search for the perfect dress, and the plan for the big celebration. Then the newly married couple becomes old news, never to be seen again. Its as if the wedding was the best moment of the couple’s life.

Angel told me the story of how she was only 18 when she got married and those first few years weren’t easy.  Doing this shoot made me realize marriage has nothing to do with the dress. The dress is just fabric.  Angle didn’t care that it got dirty, what matters are the years after.

What I learned today was that the wedding isn’t the end, its just the starting line.

The story behind the pierced nose

When I was 18 I faced a very dark time in my life that changed who I was and made me who I am now. I grew up in a loving home and had a beautiful childhood. I had never faced real pain in my life. Then I experienced heart-break from a boyfriend, who in my eyes then was, “the one”. He deleted me from his life, never to be seen or heard of again. I didn’t know how to handle the emotions I felt. I had just graduated high school, legally became an adult and had no idea who I was.

At that time I began to drawing near to God. I had no one to turn to but Him. He seemed like the only one who would understand what I was going through since He could see inside of me. Everyone else saw my situation as a part of growing up, which was true but at the time it felt like the world was ending. In fact, this was around September 11 so it really looked like the world was ending.

I decided to read the bible. When I got to the story of how Isaac met Rebecca I was inspired by their love story. Abraham, Isaac’s father, had his servant look for a wife for his son. His servant prayed that he would have success on finding a girl who fit Abraham’s specific description. After his prayer he met Rebecca. She was very generous and ready to help the servant with his camels. Long story short, the servant asked her family for her hand in marriage for Issac. He gave her a nose ring and jewelery. Rebecca trusted the Lord and the servant that who ever this Issac was, he was going to be perfect for her. She knew the servant heard from God. Now that is trust.

Rebecca and Isaac fell in love the moment they saw each other. (Gen. 24)

I decided I needed that type of trust with God. I didn’t want to spend me life worrying about who I was to marry. I then asked my parents if I could get my nose pierced. They knew I was going through a rough season but had confidences I knew what I was doing.

My dad took me to this little tattoo place. The guy sat me down, pulled out a big needle and poked the side of my nose. I fainted. When I came back he gave me water. I stood up and looked in the mirror. I now had this diamond on my face. I thought in my head, “God, every time I see this I will remember my trust in you, you will bring the right boy for me.”

Since then I’ve lost my diamond nose stud many times. When I do, it feels like I lost my wedding ring. Somehow my diamond makes its way back to me. Just now, I thought I had lost it for good. It had been a week. Today, when I was doing my bed I saw something on the floor sparkling. It was my diamond.

Though the years have past and I’m still a single girl, I remember the covenant I made with God when I was 18. Since then I’ve seen Him do miracles in my life. He’s taken me to foreign nations, introduced me to important people, brought me amazing friends, and experienced a joyful life. I’ve discovered who I am, what I want in life and put my trust in God. And when I’ve dated someone and it didn’t work out, it was okay because I knew God will work something out in the future.

Today as I put my nose ring back on, I remembered my prayer to God. I’m glad I don’t have to worry. What ever your worry is in life, if you give it to Him, He will return it with peace for years to come.

The Fight

A few weeks ago I was doing my weekly spring cleaning. I had a big box full of stuff I no longer wanted. I began to fill it with books I never read and probably would never. I came across a book my mom had bought me at the thrift store, “Every Young Girls Battle.”  When she gave it to me I made fun of it and said, “Every young girls battle is trying to find a good-looking rich man.”

Before I threw the book in the box I opened it to a page to see what kind of read it would be. To my surprise it was very interesting.

I have trouble finishing books. I tend to get bored mid way. But this book had me intrigued.  I finished it in just a couple of weeks.

The book is about how to have a healthy relationship with the opposite sex.

I never really witnessed a healthy dating relationship, in fact, I was positive it was impossible. When I say healthy, I mean a relationship where two people encourage, build, strengthen, support, push towards God, and save them selves for marriage. I’ve heard of people who have done this but I’m pretty sure they crossed a few lines while they were dating. haha.

In fact, I have a friend whose advice is, “If you wanna get married, get pregnant.” I laughed at his horrible advice but it seems that is how our culture operates.

I can recall having many conversations with friends about the battle of purity. Today’s culture doesn’t even know what that word means. I’m sure they only use it when talking about Fiji water.

“If you don’t guard your mind, you’ll find that when it comes to your relationships with the opposite sex, your resistances can be low before any encounter takes place. But you do have some choice in this matter .. you can train your mind to mind.” – Every Young Girls Battle

I didn’t realize that there are many levels of purity; mentally, emotionally, and of course physically. If the heart and mind aren’t guarded, then baggage will soon build up, causing a train of unhealthy relationships. It encourages to stay pure for the sake of your future marriage. The habits that take place in your dating life don’t go away once you are committed and married.

It was a book that every guy would hate for the girl he likes to read.. unless he desires a healthy woman to marry with no crazy baggage from all her past relationships.

It’s nice to know having a healthy relationship is possible. The secret is to respect and honor one another..and to not kiss longer than three seconds. haha