Do Something

It’s time to do something different.

To write a song lyric,

Create a painting,

To journal again.

To go back to the blank page

and write again.

Now its time to extend the beauty of God to the world.

Instead of day dreaming,

how about doing those crazy ideas of generosity.

I crossed over,

Looking towards many possibilities,

Now,

which road to take..

Turning 30

A long time ago I was a child.
But a moment ago I forgot I was an adult.
When I dream, I am 8 years old having adventures with my cousins.
When I am awake, I am 29 years old sitting in meetings, drinking my coffee and having small talk with grown ups.
I wonder if buying a house, getting married and birthing a child will make me feel grown up.
As a kid, I pictured living on a tv set with bright lights and laughing tracks to follow my every joke.
I’ve always been in a rush to move time forward.
The editor in me says, “transition, edit, cut, lets move this along.”
But just when life feels slow, it moves fast in to the past.
When I drive towards the sunset, I am reminded there is so much to life I still don’t know.
I traveled the world but yet there is still so much to see.
The questions of, “what if” & “if only’s” are fading away.
My thoughts about life are becoming, “Thank goodness.”
I’m leaving my 20’s confident
and yet entering 30 very nervous.
Maybe its time I wear shoulder pads, women suits and high heels.
It seems, the hardest part is deleting my child like thoughts about being a grown up.
I may enter the future with a blank canvas, but that just means God has a new painting to create.

The Joy of being Flawed

There is joy in being flawed,

it’s a reminder of being a part of humanity.

There is much to learn about being imperfect,

it teaches us the impossibility of doing life alone.

When I make a mistake I am comforted with grace.

When I am unaware, I see there is much to know.

Weakness displays His strength.

Grace displays His love.

The days when I feel I am common,

I look in the mirror and see there is no one like me.

The years when it seems like I haven’t achieved much,

I look back at the road I have overcome.

Faith transforms our shortcomings into a conflict won,

the only flaw I see is when I give up trying to overcome.

Travel: Rediscovering San Francisco

I’ve always seen you as a busy city but over looked
the smiles that you gave me.
The woman who made my coffee,
The man who answered my question,
made me think of a poem,
“live up north once but move before it makes you too soft.”

As I walked your crowded streets
a man that had nothing to call his own
made eye contact with me and said
“You’re beautiful”.
Maybe he was crazy
or maybe just bold enough
to say what he was thinking.
Either way he made me smile.

Now as I sit waiting for my ferry I think about how I miss judged a place I thought I knew.
I didn’t think a large city like you
Would care for a stranger like me.
But I guess that’s why so people still
migrate to your green parks and call it home.

The last time I visited,
I thought I made new friend but instead lost one.
Two years later, My life is completely different.
What was safe and predictable is now
alive and fully aware of life’s greatest adventure:
love.

Thank you San Francisco for reminding me the beauty of kindness.

Blog: The Director’s Cut

The director’s cut is when the editor creates a specialized version that represent the director’s own approved edit. This sometimes means having more scenes with more information about the characters and can ultimately have a different ending.

The past few weeks I’ve been living the Director’s cut. Which isn’t bad, just not what I pictured. I prefer fast transitions and getting to the point, but it seems the Director is fond of subtle transformations that hold significant lessons. I am noticing these unexpected scenes are indeed adding beauty to my story. There are times when I receive random snippets and have no idea how they will fit with each other. Its up to me to do something with each component and prepare for what the Director gives me next. I can expect to make a few mistakes along the way, but all I can really do is learn from them.  Sometimes as an editor, what may have been a mistake might be the very thing I was looking for. So Im allowing myself to take a few risk.

I can see the theme of faith, hope, and courage. The heart of my character is being challenged. I am learning a lot about overcoming fear and trust. Though I am tempted to question the director’s art, I trust Him. He knows what He’s doing and where He is taking the story. After all, He knows the end.

The amazing thing is He listens to me. I tell Him what I think about the story and the vision I see when I close my eyes. He takes all my ideas in to account. When I least expect it, He hands me something better than what I dreamt of. I say, “Wow, you got this from my idea?” and He answers, “It was our idea, we dreamt it together, this project is as much as yours as it is mine.”

I want the movie of my life to be God’s heart beat.   Although I am eager to know what happens, I am telling myself to enjoy the journey and to keep on being a diligent worker- to be open, to learn, grown, create, dream, pursue, read, laugh, visit, travel, seek and love.

He Spells it with An O

He spells his name with an o instead of an a. It’s a miner spelling difference but it says a lot about him.
For instances, he may seem like any other guy but the moment you interact with him, you realize he’s a lot more unique then you assumed. That if you’re lucky enough to be let in his world.
A friend of mine once described him as “a diamond, hard to find and worth the effort.” Sometimes we interact with a person so fast we never fully stop and notice the diamond within them. And if we do see it, will we be brave enough to tell them what we see?
Seasons change and time runs out. My voice of effluence expired. I failed to help him see how unique that o really is.
a poem about a name

First Name Problem, Last Name Solution

I heard a poem on a podcast a month ago that has since stayed with me. I found it fascinating and powerful.

I’m the reality of your every day life. I am many name, many faces, many shapes, and forms. I come in every size and color. I am blamed for more failures than anything or anyone else. I am no respecter of person. I do not play favorites and I never choose sides. Within me are invisible seeds of greatness and immeasurable fields of frustration. What you chose to do with me will make you better or bitter. The people that don’t want me the most inevitably have the most of me. The great paradox is, that I will never go away. Yet I can show anyone a better way. Without me there will be zero chance of success. In fact, I am the driving force behind all achievement and progress. The better you get a dealing with me the better you, you will be. Its not a matter of if you will face me but when you will face me. And with that, let me make you a guarantee. I will be in your face everyday. I am the one thing in your life that has the potential to help you think bigger, be better and do the impossible in every area of your life. Unfortunately, until you met me everything is fine and like most people say “It is what it is.” Those people by the way do not know the power I have to make their potential a reality. The most important thing about me you need to know is that I am waiting everyday to be used by you, or in worst case scenario to be used against you. Who am I? I am your Problem. And in case no one ever told you, my last name is Solution.

In 2012, I’m not sure what’s going to happen and where I will call home. I know that I am doing what most have only dreamt of doing. I will start my journey to become a film editor. This poem has encouraged me and hope it helps you as well.

You can hear the complete podcast and series from The Abundant Life Church in England here.

Poem: Make Up Your Mind

That awful feeling of failure,

knowing that you tried but yet it wasn’t good enough.

The amazing feeling of praise,

proud of the battle that was won.

What to do when the bad days happen,

when it seems like the storm has landed on top of your head.

Yes, remember the good days that have pasted,

but know there are more yet to come.

Don’t get stuck walking in the circles,

instead, be honest with yourself and the world.

Let yourself DREAM again…..

Listen for His voice.

Make up your mind to keep walking towards your destiny all the way to eternity.

I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 2 Tim 4:7

Film Making

A writer, afraid to write

A preacher, afraid to preach

A singer, afraid to sing

and me, a film maker.

The obstacle is fear itself.

The obstacle is indeed myself.

When I was a child, I filmed stories for fun.

Now as an adult, I run from telling the stories I daydream about.

Give me a camera and I’ll take photos of you.

I’ll share them with the world.

Give me a computer and I will edit a video for you.

You will smile at how I made your thoughts come alive.

The stories I have in my heart,

they are beginning to come out.

The first short film I made was to impress a boy.

The second was an attempt.

But the third,

will there be a third?

It’s easy for me to do everything else but what I really want to do.

Film make.

Most will shrug their shoulders and say I’ve seen better.

But it will be worth it when it causes a person to see their reflection.

It will be worth it when a person who has never heard God’s voice in their life,

hear it,

see it,

notice Him.

The Best Yet

The creative meetings for Easter started in March at church. As I looked for video examples to show the worship pastor I came across this beautiful credit intro on vimeo. It was modern and the style of music would be different for an Easter video. I showed it to the creative meeting and waited for their responds. After the video played I added, “Lets tell what happened at the Cross in a poetry spoken word form with abstract images displaying God’s powerful nature.” The creative team and pastor gave me thumbs up to try it.

Beth, who also edits with me arranged a guy from church to re-create the music and Erica, who is a song writer, to write a poem. When I finally got to creating the video, I sat at my desk not knowing how I was going to make this video. After Effects can be complex and I knew it was going to take some focus and time. Each 4 seconds was taking me 4 hours to create. I prayed and asked God for help.

When the video was complete, I showed the worship pastor and he was a little unsure how it was going to fit in. There was a chance it wasn’t going to get played. The day before Easter weekend it was time for the head pastor of The Rock, Pastor Jim to watch it. We set up the main auditorium so he could get the full effect. After it played I walked in the auditorium and sat down.

Pastor Jim looked at me and said, “I went a pastors conferences and someone had written a letter to that pastor saying they were going to leave the church because of the music and they said ‘God is not in that type of music’, the letter was written in the 1800’s about Amazing Grace. I was hoping we would have something alternative, lets play it.” I went back to my desk thinking about what my pastor told me.

I am part of an amazing generation. It’s true what God spoke to my heart when I was 18 years old, “you were born for such a time as this.”(Esther 4:14). I love how the church is embracing creativity and using it to bring God’s glory to a new generation. I know  God has given me a gift and I’m so glad the church allows me to use it to play a role in reaching lives.

Spanish Version Here

‘Fly away little bird’

Fly away little bird
spread your wings wide
Fly away little bird
don’t be afraid of the sky
It holds many beautiful things
sights to see
moments to capture
Fly away
as if nothing can stop you
leave the ground
as much as you want to
Shake out the sand
from under your wings
take to the air
and see new things
A little bird, though you are
Your dreams are big
Your heart is bold
Your eyes see far
but as you fly
to where you want to go
don’t lose sight
of what you have now
and what you know
Fly away little bird

– A friend wrote this for me on my birthday last year. I read it often and it reminds me of my heart.

2011

The year has gone and past

the new is here and bright.

Hope fills our being of

things not yet seen.

The possibility of what may be,

the birth of what will come,

and the joy of arriving at a dream

will go further than what we know.

In fact, it will live past our very own soul.

Happy New Years.

There is so much in store.

 

 

 

Creative juice where art thou?

Creative juice where art thou?
My soul has been sucked dry
My inspiration has vanished.

Its been to many days
since i last flew the blue skies
I can no longer give out
what i have not taken in

He is the source of my heart
I desire is to find Him
I have not seen Him for days
which feels like years.
He is above universal time and
yet I can’t seem to read His hands.

I look at the kite,
admiring its freedom,
but yet can’t help notice the string that holds it in place.
Even birds have a nest.